I was once there. And no, I don’t have it all figured out. But this morning I felt a transformation.
This morning my nine year old son yelled at me and hurled an insult.
He was frustrated.
And do you know what I did?
I calmly told him not to yell at me, swiftly administered punishment and warned him that the punishment would be more severe should he decide to do it again at any time.
Then I told him that his actions were only ruining his morning, not mine.
As all of this was happening, I felt a calmness I had never felt before when dealing with a situation like this or any tough parenting moment. And I was almost giddy. (But I kept that to myself.)
I kept composure the entire time. I never yelled. I never lost my temper. I just calmly took action and explained that what he was doing was wrong.
And, at the end of the morning, when I asked for an apology before he left for school, I got the most sincere-sounding apology I have ever received after reprimanding him.
Why am I telling you about this?
I share this because I cannot tell you how many times I have prayed for patience. I cannot tell you how many times I have asked our Father to help me stay calm. I cannot tell you how many times I have cried out to him and said “Where are these fruits of the spirit? Why aren’t they in me?”
This morning, they were there. I had peace. I had patience. I had self-control.
God is giving me those things.
So, to all of you moms of little ones who are tired and frustrated and wondering what is wrong with you and wondering why this parenting thing is so hard, much harder than you ever expected at times: Hang in there. Keep praying. And keep growing. Because it is coming. At one point you will see the fruit of the spirit in you. And, it will give you confidence the next time a struggle rears its ugly head.
I have cried in frustration. Frustration in babyhood from my child not going to sleep or not nursing or eating, frustration as they are getting older from a child’s bad behavior, and all-time frustration from feeling like a total failure as a mom. I have asked God to help and wondered why it has felt like He had left me floundering, and hoping that all that floundering would add up to something good some day.
Well, it has.
Today was a breakthrough.
I have more hope now. He is with me. He is guiding me. And I can do all things with Christ…. even maintain my composure and parent.
I have no doubt there will be tougher times. This morning, however, He showed me that He IS with me. And He will guide me and I am growing.
Wa-HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Thank you, Father!!!!!!!!!!!
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